Today is somehow different. I stay awake again until this time and it's nearly the time for sun to wake up :D
Today, I am full of energy and idea. This is something that I want, but it seldom happen in my life. It is not as often as few years back. When I am the only one spending my time in my room. Creating imaginative friends which accompany me in the dark, in my lonely year, in the darkest time in my life.
It might sound as a bad thing but not for me. Somehow this is the life that I seek, this is the moment that i want to have if possible everyday in my life. A moment where my sense become very sharp, my mind become very calm and I blend with my surrounding. Extending my consciousness to the limit where I can feel everything, where I realize who I am and take fully control of my mind and my body.
I want this moment to always happen. Its the only moment where I can totally focus. Where my creativity level increase to extreme level, the most productive time of my life. In this moment, I am able to produce something. In this moment, I am able to code hundreds line of code. In this moment, I am able to fully design my dream and my life and how should I go through it.
It is exhausting just to make myself stay awake and I wonder when this kind of moment will appear again. I kinda miss this moment which I always dream of.
The 2/3 portion near the end of the night. The moment I longing for.
